Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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