If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
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