WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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