You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
