Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
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It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
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Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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