she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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