Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
