i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize