I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
