He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I think people are normalizing furries
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize