maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
