Swine flu is the new snow day.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
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