would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
