I faked an abortion last night.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!