So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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