She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize