I wanna bring you to show and tell
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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