I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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