I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
and you fell through a lawn chair
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
