White coat. Heels.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Come see our sink grown plant.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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