Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
