Christians are straight up FREAKS
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
