Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
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I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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