the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize