sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
