we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize