I skipped work to stalk him.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
