I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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