went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
