dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
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I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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