john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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