Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
only you would photoshop your dick
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
