How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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