That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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