please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
