I feel great
I just peed on a car
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
