hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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