Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
