Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
