Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
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i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
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well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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