Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
