Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize