Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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