would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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