All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
