Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
