i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
