feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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