Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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