After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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